THE TOP 10 CARTOON CHARACTERS MOST LIKELY TO USE DRUGS


10. Gargamel

Most likely LSD. He spends his life in pursuit of little blue guys in white outfits and mentally abusing his cat. What does he plan to do with the blue dwarfs once he catches them anyway?

9. Olive Oyl

Probably Dexatrim Abuse, maybe some amphetamines. Who's that skinny?!

She might even be anorexic, she is always giving her burger to her friend.

8. Snagglepuss

Can't explain it. Maybe it's the name or the look, but he's suspicious.

7. He-man

This is the easy one. I mean c'mon. Roid monkey No. 1. "BY THE POWER OF ANABOL!!!" Makes me want to root for Skelator. Alone on his castle, hitting the weights. And on top of that, he even injects the stuff in his pet tiger -- animal abuse.

6. & 5. Yogi and Boo-Boo

We all know what is really in those picnic baskets. They go back to their cave and trip.

4. Droopy

The number one downer in toon land. Can't someone slip him an upper once in a while? The only time he is ever able to snap out of his drugged stupor is when he sees a picture of one of his babes.

3. Dopey Dwarf

He openly admits it. The other dwarfs deny involvement, but they are under investigation. Allegations is that Doc is writing some extra scripts for Sneezy and all the guys partaking are afloat.

2. Daffy Duck

If he isn't using crack, Marion Barry is clean. He is so wired, he bounces around on his head without pain. Blows his beak off all the time. Some symptoms might be from "daffiness," but Haldol wouldn't work for him. It might be for his buddy with Tourettes, Porky.

1. Shaggy

By far the No. 1 suspect. His clothes, his hair, his bad goatee and the boy converses with dogs. All of this is nothing until you consider the munchie factor. Anybody who consumes 9.3 dog treats per episode must be smoking weed.


Not my work, Bruce Ellis: brucee@chunder.com, Home.