Gates Of
Delirium
Another truism about Microsoft. At a recent
computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates
reportedly compared the computer
industry with the auto industry and stated "If GM had
kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would
all be driving twenty-five dollar cars that got 1000
mi/gal."
Recently General Motors addressed this comment by releasing
the statement "Yes, but would you want your car to crash twice a day?"

- Every time they repainted the lines on the road you would
have to buy a new car.
- Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no
reason, and you would just accept this, restart and drive
on.
- Occasionally, executing a maneuver would cause your car
to stop and fail and you would have to reinstall the
engine. For some strange reason, you would accept this
too.
- You could only have one person in the car at a time,
unless you bought "Car95" or "CarNT".
But, then you would have to buy more seats.
- Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun,
was reliable, five times as fast, twice as easy to drive,
but would only run on 5% of the roads.
- The Macintosh car owners would get expensive Microsoft
upgrades to their cars, which would make their cars run
much slower.
- The oil, gas and alternator warning lights would be
replaced by a single "general fault" warning
light.
- New seats would force everyone to have the same size
butts.
- The airbag system would say "are you sure?"
before going off.
- If you were involved in a crash, you would have no idea
what happened.
Not my work, Bruce
Ellis: brucee@chunder.com,
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